S: Narrative Writing Revised

Think about the shows you watch during the week on television. What kind of shows do you enjoy most? What kind of shows do you avoid? Watch a television show that you would normally not watch. On a separate piece of paper, write a review of that television show. Focus your review on a particular aspect of the show: the plot, the actors, the acting, or the writing. Back up your opinions and reactions with information from the show.

Crash: A Tale of Two Species

Did you ever know that there are birds that are becoming extinct now? Red knots are a small bird becoming extinct because of people. To save the Redknots, horseshoe crabs have to stop being taken by people because the crabs eggs give the Redknots protein for the long journey to the Arctic. But we might be too late to save them.

Biologist are studying Redknots. When they studied the birds, they started to study horseshoe crabs because that was the cause of the birds declining. They told people to stop taking Horseshoe crabs. Some of the birds didn't fatten up enough to fly to the Arctic. Then the birds flew.

When the biologists got there, there was not trace of a bird anywhere. They searched other parts of the Arctic, but there was nothing. They even listened for the birds, but it was as quiet as the moon. They gave up searchig. It was hopeless.

The Redknots were called moonbirds because they flew enough miles to get to the moon. Biologists are going to try to find the moonbird next year. But the birds might already be gone.

My opinion of this story is that it is interesting, because I learned more about an animal(s) that I didn't know much about before.

My reaction was absorbing in all the facts from the show.

Revised Version
_________
Crash: A Tale of Two Species

Do you know that there are birds that can fly all the way to the moon are becoming extinct? Red knots are small birds that are becoming extinct because of people. To save the Redknots, people have to stop taking horseshoe crabs because the crabs eggs give the Redknots protein for the long journey to the Arctic. But we might be too late to save them.

Biologist are studying Redknots. When they studied the birds, they started to study horseshoe crabs because that was the cause of the birds decline. They told people to stop taking Horseshoe crabs. Some of the birds didn't fatten up enough to fly to the Arctic, but they flew anyway. Those birds that didn't eat enough died or fell.

When the biologists arrived at the Arctic, there was no trace of a Redknot anywhere. They searched other parts of the Arctic, but there was nothing. They even listened for the birds, but it was as quiet as the moon. They gave up searchig. It was hopeless.

The Redknots are called moonbirds because they flew enough miles to get to the moon. Biologists are going to try to find the moonbirds next year. But the birds might already be gone.

I think that this story is interesting because I learned more about an animal(s) that I didn't know much about before. Throughout the show I was absorbing all the facts. I would watch this show again.

-----------------------

She was probably adamant that hubby and I gave her B that she wanted to do the revision. It was one of the very best attitude she put forth in revising her writing. I later asked her though, if she liked doing it.

"No," was her answer, but I thanked her for her cheerful attitude and amiability during the revision.

For someone who started reading at the age of 3, is now an avid reader, and has a reading speed that is probably the same as that of an adult who is himself an avid reader, I am expecting better writing skills from S. Maybe it's just me being ignorant of how children her age write, or maybe it's just my perfectionism meddling in, or maybe she is truly capable or writing better. At any rate, this is still a learning process, and even if she never grows to like writing, I truly hope she does develop better writing skills inshaallah.

Today, I opened my inbox that contains communication between her assigned teacher and myself and this was what she said about S's writing:

S continues to make excellent progress in this area. Her writing skills are advanced for her age, very impressed with her growth!

I still can't see what she means. Hubby even suggested that maybe the teacher is saying so because we are non-native speakers, and for non-natives, she is good.

Spring is here?

The spring breeze is unlike any other breeze I've felt before. The fragrance of fresh hyacinth brings back memories of my first Spring in the United States, when S was in my womb. I bought my first bulb' red tulips from Beardshear Hall, and brought it back to the apartment, and placed it next to my mattress. Seeing it everyday somehow lifted my spirits. I suppose, subconsciously, all these years, spring has a profound meaning for me, hence why it's my favorite season.

"I think I'm changing my mind about fall," S said today, as we sat on the back porch, enjoying the extra ice weather after bouts of snow, sleet, and ice for the past weeks.

Her favorite season was fall, but today, she's changing her mind.

At first, I didn't let them play outside, but when I looked at the current temperature on our local TV station channel, 61 F seemed a very enticing temperature. i told them they could do their math outside, but then Baby Z fell asleep, so it was put on hold. Lunch time came, and Baby Z had awaken just a few minutes before, so I told them we could all have lunch on the back porch. They bounded downstairs with glee.

You could see how a little fresh air put them in better spirits. As we sat on the pink picnic cloth they had laid out on the back porch, and ate our lunch that consisted of spicy french fried sambal, baked chicken, and stir fry vegetables with rice, I told them of how I used to have little picnics like that with them when we were in Iowa. Our apartment in Iowa had a fenced in front yard, which provided me with ample privacy for gardening and just hanging out. When spring came, I would rejoice, pack our lunches, and lug the three kids outside, sometimes to the playground, sometimes to the front yard and sometimes to the shared yard out the patio door. I loved that life. I sensed that they loved hearing about it too.

Baby Z had his first spring experience, well maybe not his first, since he was born around springtime, but at least the first experience he is able to enjoy. We sat him in his chair, S fed him his lunch, under the warm sun, caressed by the spring breeze. He seemed to enjoy it immensely, laughing, smiling, and blinking at the sudden brightness. I have a feeling he enjoys being outside, regardless of the weather. Once when we took him out when it was frigid, he smiled and grinned at the biting cold. I already have three kids who do NOT like to put on their coats when they go outside, when the temperature requires it. Am I raising another one? Alas, I think all kids hate to put their coats on regardless of how low the temperature is outside.

Now, if we can only speed up finishing the K12 curriculum so we can enjoy more spring weather, or should I say, if only we could have more days with weather such as today...ahhh....

S : Narrative Writing 1 pg 3

From Test Ready Language Arts Level 5:

Think about the shows you watch during the week on television. What kind of shows do you enjoy most? What kind of shows do you avoid? Watch a television show that you would normally not watch. On a separate piece of paper, write a review of that television show. Focus your review on a particular aspect of the show: the plot, the actors, the acting, or the writing. Back up your opinions and reactions with information from the show.

Crash: A Tale of Two Species

Did you ever know that there are birds that are becoming extinct now? Red knots are a small bird becoming extinct because of people. To save the Redknots, horseshoe crabs have to stop being taken by people because the crabs eggs give the Redknots protein for the long journey to the Arctic. But we might be too late to save them.

Biologist are studying Redknots. When they studied the birds, they started to study horseshoe crabs because that was the cause of the birds declining. They told people to stop taking Horseshoe crabs. Some of the birds didn't fatten up enough to fly to the Arctic. Then the birds flew.

When the biologists got there, there was not trace of a bird anywhere. They searched other parts of the Arctic, but there was nothing. They even listened for the birds, but it was as quiet as the moon. They gave up searchig. It was hopeless.

The Redknots were called moonbirds because they flew enough miles to get to the moon. Biologists are going to try to find the moonbird next year. But the birds might alredy be gone.

My opinion of this story is that it is interesting, because I learned more about an animal(s) that I didn't know much about before.

My reaction was absorbing in all the facts from the show.

----------------------

S has started to do the practice tests in the Test Ready booklets to prepare for the OAT(Ohio Achievement Test) in April. I had a phone conference with her assigned teacher months ago, and she had said to me that S writing is excellent. I have been grading S's writing through rubric, and I felt that i was pretty hard on her. So I asked her teacher,

"So I was pretty hard on her then?"

'Oh no, no, you were not. No, you should keep your standards high because she is capable of doing really great!"

I asked S to look over this piece of writing she did, to really look over it and correct any mistakes she sees. She did last night, and the only thing she corrected was the one in red. I have always told her to read her writing out loud but I don't think she does if I don't make sure she does.

I gave this to hubby to 'grade' and he gave her a B, B-. I'd probably give her the same grade too.

So it seems that I have some work to do...

When PMD Attacks

For the past two months, I have had 4 attacks of Plugged Milk Ducts, or what I now lovingly call PMD. I've had mastitis before, once, when I was nursing H, but I believe I've never had PMD until recently.

The first attack lasted less than 24 hours as we massaged, soaked, applied warm compress, nursed and did everything we could to get that plugged duct to drain. The second attack happened as I was preparing for Chain of Command. Understandably, all the stress and anxiety proably contributed to the attack in the first place. The third attack was somewhat expected. I missed the last day of Chain of Command due to it. Baby Z had went without nursing for 5 hours straight, so I wasn't that surprised when the attack came, but I was still dismayed.

The fourth attack happened because Baby Z left me high and dry after he recovered from his flu during which he had high fever for 3 days straight. On the fourth day, after nursing all night, he slept through the morning, leaving my body continuously producing milk to the point of blockage. It was during this fourth attack that I truly employed my children to help me iron the wet towel to make myself a warm compress.

Before, I employed them to dunk the towel in hot water, squeeze it and bring it to me. Poor kids, the water was hot. I figured out that ironing a wet towel is more convenient and less messy, so on the third attack, I tried it.

I am ashamed to admit(especially to my fellow Malaysians) that it has been years since I have ironed anything. My husband even irons his own clothes when he needs to, which is not that often, so the iron is something novel to the children.

So when I repeatedly asked them to iron that wet towel for me, they did it quite willingly. In fact they fought over who got to do it. The fourth attack lasted about 24 plus hours, close to 48, which really worried me to no end. But the kids got to 'play' with the iron for about more than 24 hours. I even thought to myself, as H chattered,

"Should I do it to rayon? Ummi, I'll do it to rayon, ok?"

"Make it point to crayon!"

"Ummi's doing rayon!"

that were I not so occupied with trying to unplug the plugged ducts, it could have been a learning moment. We could have researched the types of fabric, and it would have been something relevant at the time for them. It wouldn't be forced learning or learning something because the curriculum tells you to. It would be because of natural curiosity, and it would remain longer in their brain as they connect with the subject matter, inshaallah.

That's what Rh have noticed in them. Rh comes every Friday to teach them 'Islamic Studies', and as her major is childhood education, she is currently reading up teaching techniques, learning processes and what not. In fact, her reading material is not so different from what I have been reading all these years. She mentioned to me that the kids seems to connect better with something when it means something to them. Subhanallah, it is true. Shove geography, science, history and whatever else you have to them without meaning, and they will just as soon forget all the facts and information as quickly as they can. But take them out on a nature walk, involve them in the activity, spark some sincere interest, and they will actually even seek to learn about the subject matter themselves, and remember it longer, if not forever. This is the kind of homeschooling I want to start to do once we're done with OHVA, inshaallah.

We did do a 'tree hunt' a couple of times during Spring. I took them all for a walk outside, and we took leaves, twigs, flowers from some trees, and compared them to the trees in the tree guide from the library. I actually now know what a crab apple tree looks like. It's a learning experience that involves even the teacher, who in the beginning knows nothing whatsoever about the subject matter!

I yearn to do something like that again, inshaallah, and with Baby Z, things sure are a wee bit more challenging, especially since he is a high maintenance baby, what with his eczema and allergies.

Alhamdulillah reading has become second nature to the children. Most of the time, they learn about what interests them through their own reading, on their own time, ironically, 'outside' of 'school time'. I'm really glad I took the trouble to do the Glenn Doman method with S when she was 3. Now I really need to start on Baby Z, inshaallah...but...let's pray that the PMD attacks are held at bay now and forever, inshaallah. Ameen!

Resident Poet

Our literature today covered several poems with the theme 'imagination'. One of the activities was to write their own imagination poem. H wrote his. Pretty good, I must say, mashaallah! He has improved a lot in one year, though his handwriting could use more attention to punctuation and be more legible. But I guess all that reading pays off, alhamdulillah.

Jannnah Life
My imagination said one day
"Take my hand lets fly away",
So off we went to fly,
in the mornin' sky,
my imagination told me"hurry up!",
so I went faster than a pup
up,up,up!,
finally we were there,
faster than a zippy bear,
in a place bad people don't go,
in this magnificent place obedient people go,
where I see
people don't pee,
in this life
people don't use the knife,
Jannah is the life!

By H

A Productive Day

Yesterday was a productive day. I no longer consider going through OHVA curriculum as what the kids enjoy, as they ardently hate it. So when a homeschool day is productive, it usually means we get to do something else other than OHVA lessons.

Both N and H are entering the Reading Rainbow Young Writers & Illustrators contest. Note that not everything about OHVA is bad; I do benefit a lot from doing those lesson plans, and especially from the phone conferences with the teachers. It's just that when you have multiple children at different levels, following a set curriculum where you don't have any control can be frustrating. N and H's teacher sent me a PDF file on how to improve students' writing, based on the Reading Rainbow contest, and I used that yesterday to revise N's story with her. She managed to cut down on her word count, as the maximum is 350 where she has over 1000 words. I will still need to work with her and help her cut out more words to abide by the rules of the contest.

As for H, I managed to train him how to use Moodle (Columbus Dawah School). Except for the Part 1 notes, he uploaded all the other part of the notes for Love Notes, mashaallah. I dubbed him 'The Moodle Guy'. Seeing how technical this boy is, managing moodle does seem to be something he would be interested in, whereas for N, when I asked her what part she would like to play in the Seats of Scholars team, she expressed no interest whatsoever, so I left her alone.

As for S, I inducted her into the Seats of Scholars team, as the kids now have an email account. Her task will be to remind the team of any tasks that need to be done by a deadline inshaallah. Hopefully this will train her how to use a planner, and will be a start in getting her involved in dawah projects inshaallah.

So all in all, I would say that yesterday was a very productive day. Homeschooling is not necessarily about mastering academics, but more about living life, mastering new skills, and learning to get along as a family, at least that's how I have started to see it after all these years of clocking in school hours and marking off lessons. Alhamdulillah!

Nearest Book Meme

As generously tagged by Mona UmmIbrahim of The Imam's Daughter.

Rules:
1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pages)
2. Open the book to page 123
3. Find the 5th Sentence.
4. Post the next 3 sentences
5. Tag 5 people

I happened to be reading The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families by Stephen Covey, and when I glanced to the right, there it was, lying idly on a stack of school textbooks I had yet to grade.

So on to the 5th sentence of page 123:

In a critical review of the Time Bind (referred to on page 121), Betsy Morris takes exception to Hochschild's view that parents spend more time at work because they find it more pleasant than dealing with challenges of home life.

The next 3 sentences:

"More likely," she says, "is that parents are killing themselves because they have to keep their jobs."

To make ends meet and for other reasons - including the desire to maintain a certain lifestyle-the percentage of families where there is one parent working and one at home with the children has dropped from 66.7 percent in 1940 to 16.9 percent in 1994.

And today some 14.6 million children live in poverty-90 percent of whom live in one-parent homes.

As I was flipping the pages trying to find page 123, curiosity and a certain kind of excitement coursed through me. I wondered what would be on page 123. Earlier in the day, I had sent out an email with a link to this book on google, and in that email, I highlighted the chapter that talks about the hectic lifestyle of a two income family.

So it's amazing that this meme 'chose' this particular issue from this book. I grew up in a one income household, but then again, we were blessed with wealth, so there was no issue of needing two incomes to survive. Right now, there is also no issue of needing two incomes to survive, even though we can be categorized as being under the poverty line here in the States. Alhamdulillah, we survive. As for lifestyle, I guess, you make do with what you have. If we were to go back home and live in Kuala Lumpur, I honestly don't know what I would do, as there would be so many outside pressure to live a certain lifestyle - something akin to a rat race, as my aunt once advised,

"Stay there, you don't need to come back here. It's a rat race here."

It is true, I have to say. At least, where we are now in the community, no one cares what car we drive, what brand shoes we wear and whether we have matching sets of plates or not. I have feared and still fear entering that stage of our life. I guess you could say it's the fear of the unknown. We have lived the lifestyle of students for 11 years, and we don't have matching plates nor have we had teacups until very recently.

Hubby cringed every time we had to serve guests tea in tall glasses or foam paper cups, and I do believe he feels it a great burden to earn more. I really don't care, well maybe deep down I do (I just don't realize it), but I try not to care too much because I know that with increasing wealth, there also comes increasing tests. I had kind of wished that we could live the life of students forever, but I know that is unrealistic with increasing number of children. And now, we are job hunting. Who knows where we will end up in a few months. In Abdulbary's lecture, he said,

"When you ask for wealth, don't just ask for wealth, but ask for wealth that is blessed by Allah."

So,

"Oh, Allah, You are the Provider, and all Provision come from You. Please place us in a place and environment where we will be surrounded by people who will guide us to the truth and keep us on that path, and are good influence on our children so they can grow up to be those whom you bless with knowledge and wisdom. Oh Allah, please bestow on us wealth that is blessed by You. Ameen."



I tag makcik, finie, afafita, fauz, and Elsa.

Sew Giving Blanket Drive

A week. We had about a week to crochet ourselves to two baby blankets for the Sew Giving Blanket Drive. This is my first. This is also S's first. Alhamdulillah, we did finish our baby blankets yesterday, on the deadline.

Ahh...how we both crocheted and crocheted the past week. Seeing our blankets making progress bit by bit was really something. S had started making hers first, and I had told her that hers was not long enough, and I made mine longer, but mine proved to be a little bit too long. Hers is actually the perfect size. There were glaring holes in hers, and the sides were somewhat skewed, but overall, S's blanket seems to be more comfy, as the stitches were pretty loose. My stitches were close together and it made the blanket pretty rigid. I also love S's color combo better.

Since this is my first, I also failed to read the instructions on the label of the yarn, and it turned out that we had bought not enough yarn, hence the crazy color combo on mine. I started crocheting the green and yellow into my colorful yarn combo because I was afraid there wouldn't be enough of the colorful yarn to finish a blanket. S ran out of the blue, so she made the striped pattern be the middle pattern. It was all 'winging it'. Alhamdulillah they turned out pretty good for first timers!



Today, hubby is mailing them to California. In our haste, and due to some unexpected visitors last night, we didn't have enough time to make cards or notes to accompany the blankets. So this morning, S and I made them, even though hubby has already brought the packed blankets with him to his office. While choosing the patterned card stock, we pleasantly came up with matching colors for the blankets; mine purple with all the other colors, and S's blue and yellowish. Sweet!









Hubby dropped by to pick up our cards before heading to the Post Office. Alhamdulillah...I hope they reach the sister in time and in good condition. Ameen.
Now on to our next project: the Muslimah Doll Project!

A Bitter Dose of Reality

Right after Fajr, after I am done with my 'at least one-ayah-a-day memorization', and the kids are done with their memorization and review, hubby gives Baby Z his morning bath. S, N, and H dash downstairs, and I dash to the computer to get some email time before school starts.

"Who's gonna make Z's food?" hubby yells, and one of the kids say,

"N!" or

"S!" or

"H!".

Once hubby's done with Baby Z, he goes downstairs with Baby Z and joins the kids. From my port upstairs in their room, I hear the kids talking, laughing, giggling, joking, and I hear hubby cracking jokes downstairs. I hear plates, spoons clattering. I hear the fridge door creaking open and shut again. I hear Baby Z babbling and cooing, probably cracking his own baby jokes. I rush through replying emails, hoping to catch breakfast before they are all done. Alas, as always is the case, before I am done, I hear little feet bounding up the wooden stairs back to the room. All four of them are done with breakfast.

I am struck with a feeling of panic and 'oh no here we go again'. Once again I have wasted my time, and suddenly I am rushed. I dash downstairs, and grab something to eat (which is a feat in itself considering the restrictions on my diet due to Baby Z's allergies (no milk, peanuts or anything in the legumes family, egg whites, wheat, soy)). I do the dishes, and realizing that Baby Z's porridge has run out, I grab an empty saucepan, dunk a cup of white rice in it, wash it a few times, drown it in cups upon cups of water and put it on Hi on the stove. Gulping down my breakfast of tapioca bread slathered with marmalade, I shout to the kids upstairs,

"I hope you're doing your school up there!"


Quickly, I pull open the fridge door, grab the cartons of rice milk, pour myself a glass of white and chocolate rice milk combo, and bring it upstairs, leaving the saucepan of cooking porridge on the stove. I have to rush because the kids might not be doing what they're supposed to do without supervision. Plus, Baby Z is bound to be hungry and will want to nurse very soon.

I get to their room, and they are all sprawled on the floor, doing their work. Baby Z is busy navigating through caramel, chocolate and vanilla legs and arms, open fat textbooks, and laptops, looking for an aneroxic pencil(the kids sharpen their pencil with a knife because pencil sharpeners fail us, and thy sharpen not just the tip, but also the body) to play with.

Across and over those caramel, chocolate and vanilla legs, I head for the computer chair with my glass of rice milk. There are books stacked haphazardly on the table; works that I need to check. I sigh and put my glass of rice milk down on the computer table, hoping it won't be knocked over.

"Ok, H come and do literature with me now, before Z cries."

Too late, Baby Z is already beginning to wail and pine for my milk. He's sleepy, and puts one hand in his mouth (his signal for breastmilk). I pick him up and nurse him while browsing the internet. He falls asleep while nursing. I type with one hand and chat with hubby on gmail, as we need to mail the baby blankets we made today. We have forgotten to include note cards in the blanket packet hubby has brought with him to the office. I tell hubby to wait, as I go to the room to put Baby Z down. He wakes up as the nipple is released. Eyes wide open, he gurgles and coos, and reaches out one hand to touch my face. He smiles. I smile back. He babbles. I tell him (in Malay),

"Z, go to sleep, ok?"

He just continues smiling at me, and grabs my glasses. I sigh, get up, and proceed to leave him, hoping he will fall asleep on his own. As I go out the door, I say salam to him, and he continues smiling that winning smile of his. I close the door. He screams. I go back to the kids' room, and calls one of them to do something with me. I leave Baby Z screaming in the room. Meanwhile, S continues my chat with hubby, and around noon, hubby is to come home and get our cards and include them in the blanket package.

N is stuck with her math. I help her. Baby Z's screaming fill the background.

"S, if he keeps crying, you put him to sleep, " I tell S. She nods and continues to do her work.

N is really stuck, and while Baby Z screams in the other room, I feel my patience slipping away. I need to go to the bathroom. I tell S to take Baby Z, and I shower.

As I get out of the tub, I smell something burning.

"The porridge!" I yell as I swung the bathroom door open.

"Is it burned?" I ask.

"Well, the bottom is hard," S replies.

I dress myself, and already, I am brimming with stress. It's only 9 a.m.

I run downstairs, dunk the burnt rice in the trash and make another pot.

I work with N. H comes to ask me something, I snap at him to wait because I am busy with N. I work with N until she gets it. I leave her, and move on to H. He is doing fine, alhamdulillah. He learns about area and volume by himself. I check his work. I'm pleasantly surprised. He understands them perfectly with no help from me. I feel calm entering my heart. I commend him on a job well done. I give him more work. He accepts them with no complaints.

N is still stuck. I help her again. She fidgets, stretches her shirt to fit her knees, and moves about. I feel patience slipping away again, but I hold myself in check. My voice increases in volume bit by bit. Meanwhile, Baby Z is back on his adventurous trek on the floor. Every now and again, the kids have to take away the pencil from him, and pull his away as he rips out a a page from their textbooks. He cries each time. I feel my blood pressure climbing.

If I leave them to nurse Baby Z, they either won't do their work, or they will wait for me to work with them when they are done doing what they can do on their own. I stretch Baby Z's waiting time. I know he's hungry and sleepy, but he nurses so long. So I put him on hold.

N gets it, and I am relieved. S asks me to do literature with her. I sit down and nurse Baby Z, and she hands me the teacher guide literature book. She reads the selection, and when she's done, I ask the questions. Baby Z falls asleep again. I try to get up, and he lets go of the nipple, and he scrambles to suck it in again. I sit back down. He sucks, still asleep, and I try to get up again. He's dead tired and stirs only slightly. I put him on the bed, and he scrambles to suck the nipple again. I lay down with him for a while, hoping I won't fall asleep myself. Quietly, I detach myself from him. He continues to sleep. Sighing with relief, I get crawl out of bed, bit by bit, and head for the door. I close the door quietly. He's still asleep. Alhamdulillah!

I head to blogspot and proceed to write this post. The kids are now downstairs eating lunch, or maybe they are done. I hear only silence. I think they are reading. I'd better head downstairs and have lunch myself, before Baby Z wakes up and I am thrown into the same crazy tumble again.

Blueberry Pancakes

N was doing Study Island when she came across a Blueberry Pancake recipe which she and S apparently copied down onto their small white boards. It has been a while since they have done any baking, especially since my elimination diet restricts me from a lot of baked goods that would usually contain eggs and milk. However, the kids are totally capable of baking without me now. When I asked N why they don't bake anymore, she said,

"But S wouldn't let us do the fun stuff."

Hmm... that sounds rather familiar.

When I asked S why they don't bake anymore, she said,

"There's no time."

I guess that is true. Ever since we decided to finish up OHVA, it's just been hectic.

It was Saturday morning, and hubby had apparently told them that they could make the pancakes, or at least hinted for them to make the pancakes themselves.

I was listening to Dr. Hesham Al-Awadi's lecture 'Children Around the Prophet' while crocheting the baby blanket, and hubby was sleeping on the kids bed. H popped in and asked hubby about the pancake. Hubby muttered something like,

"Begin without me and finish without me."

H dashed back downstairs, and a few minutes later, I smelled something from the stove. As much as I hate being interrupted, I forced myself to stop crocheting to check out if they're burning the house down. As soon as I entered the kitchen, I came across three chidlren huddled in front of the stove, some standing on the step stool. S of course was the master chef in charge of flipping the pancakes, while H ladled the batter. Both H and S claimed,

"N didn't help much," but as I stood there watching them, she somehow busied herself with the pancake batter.

Baby Z had been downstairs with them, and while I looked around the kitchen, marveling at the kids' independence, I peered at Baby Z, apparently doing his own stuff on the couch.

I bounded back upstairs and brought my crochet downstairs. I continued my crocheting on the couch. The kids took their time, and before long, they were sitting at the table enjoying their hard-earned reward:

Peanut Butter Chips Pancake

The Islamic Household

I stumbled upon a plethora of resources for Muslim families, subjects ranging from Marriage to Raising Children, mashaallah.

I was also pleasantly surprised to find that the complete notes for Fiqh of Love taught by Sheikh Yaser Birjas is available.

May Allah guide all Muslim families on the right path, seeking His pleasure and the Ultimate reward in living our family lives. Ameen.

The Quran Rocks!

Many a times we recite the Quran, but many a times, we don't ponder over the speech of Allah to benefit from it. Subhanallah, learning the Quran in depth would surely then give you an emanrush!

Check this one out.

The Babe

One of the reasons I had started this blog was to keep a journal documenting the kids' antics. I had attempted a physical handwritten journal when S, N and H were younger, but with three kids under the age of 4 it proved to be unrealistic, as I was always completely exhausted by the end of the day. I however, managed to record S and N chatting prior to taking their nap, and listening to it makes me want to relive those years, despite the toil I went through.

That's what makes mothers among the craziest people in the world. They go through morning sickness, back pain, leg pain, sleepless nights, sinking couches, frequent bathroom miles, and much much more during pregnancy. Then they go through teeth gritting pain, no, hand squishing pain, no, arm biting pain for hours on end to deliver their bundles of joy. And that is just the beginning, baby. Then they go through truly sleepless nights, engorged breasts, cracked nipples, tearful moments, falling hair, ugly blobs, and much much more. And if that's not enough, they then go through juggling phases, stick-like-glue phases(when you have to bring baby in the bathroom with you because he stick to you like glue), cooking while baby cries moments, can't pick up the phone or get the door while you're nursing moments, naps interrupted resulting in cranky baby moments, and much much more.

And then they start talking about having another one. Hello! Are you a martyr, sadist, or just plain crazy? I rest my case.

Then again, only the insane understands the fellow insane. Only a mother can truly understand what it feels like to have her own flesh and blood right before her, and no matter how much trouble she went through for that little being, after she recollects herself and stop muttering over hoe hard life is, she will meander into the world of the 'loony mothers' and dream of hatching another little being, and go through all that again.

Baby Z is now almost 10 months old, crawling at a beginner's level, pulling himself up to stand, saying mamama, papapapa, and some other words we can't seem to understand, and finally growing two bottom pearly whites. He's really on the move, and just today, we have had to reposition him again and again as he reaches for the kids' school books, my laptop, and everything else in sight. Suffice it to say, now is the time I would really lose weight from constant movement, along with his.

I realize that I have been skimping on jotting down stories about Baby Z, just because homeschooling is the 'theme' of this blog, but I am now reminded that my budding purpose for starting this blog is to document my children's antics and now Baby Z is very much a part 'Days of Our Lives'.

Etiquettes as Teachers

On Free Friday, I met a mother who was looking for audio CDs pertaining to parenting. As I helped her look for one, I realized that her search resonated with my own. I'm always on the lookout for parenting tips and guides nowadays, especially since the kids are entering new stages of childhood each year. There are a lot of parenting books out there, but those that are catered for Muslims are very few, and those that are available, I personally find lacking in vivid real life examples. However, the good news is that most parenting books written by non Muslims actually utilize the sunnah, at least 80% of the time. Most Muslims don't realize that the sunnah embodies so much of what is now in the hands of non Muslims, and as a consequence, we look up to the west and think of Islam as being backward. This is most probably because we have lost touch with the legacy left by Rasulullah Sallallahu alayhi wasallam, nastaghfirullah.

In class, Shaykh Abdulbary covered a topic that I easily can recall without glancing at my notes, as it pertains a lot to parenting especially homeschooling; etiquettes as teachers. Of course, we are all 'teachers' whether we realize it or not. So here are what he mentioned:

1. Al Hirs
Al hirs is a strong sincere desire for goodness for your students. For parents who are homeschooling, it's easy to have this Hirs because every parent wants good for his/her children.
For teachers in school however, this Hirs has to be thught of consciously, as it might not as easily to them especially when they're on the verge of burning out. I was reading Stephen Covey's 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families this morning, and I came across a point he made about 'a good parent is way better than an excellent caregiver'. He was talking about sending your child to a daycare versus staying home and caring for that child yourself. No matter how competent and trustworthy someone is, a child is much better off cared for by a good parent, because it is in a parent's nature to sincerely want good for her child.

On this point the Shaykh mentioned the hadith of Abu Dharr who was advised by Rasulullah sallalahu alayhi wasallam to not take a position of leadership. Abu Dharr was the strongest in terms of Ibadah, but he is not one who would make a good leaders, and in advising him as such, Rasulullah sallalahu alayhi wasallam was exercising the Hirs for Abu Dharr. From here also, we can extract the lesson that someone who is pious is not necessarily good material for leadership roles, and vice versa.

He also mentioned the ayah,

Surah At-Tawbah:

Muhsin Khan: Verily, there has come unto you a Messenger (Muhammad SAW) from amongst yourselves (i.e. whom you know well). It grieves him that you should receive any injury or difficulty. He (Muhammad SAW) is anxious over you (to be rightly guided, to repent to Allah, and beg Him to pardon and forgive your sins, in order that you may enter Paradise and be saved from the punishment of the Hell-fire), for the believers (he SAW is) full of pity, kind, and merciful. [9:128]

2. Being gentle and kind when speaking to the students

This might be a little challenging when parents are having bad days, in whcih the advise would be: grab a kit kat!

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam would always treat each sahaba kindly such that each of them would think that they're the most beloved to him as in the case of Amr Ibn al-Aas who asked rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam who among the men does he love best.

3. Tawaddhu' (being humble)

Once the Prophet salllaahu alayhi wasallam was giving a khutbah when a man came to tell him that a man had come to learn about Islam. Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam stopped his khutbah and told the sahab to get two chairs for that man who wanted to learn islam and the man who brought the message. The prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam then taught the man until the man was satisfied and only after did he return to his khutbah.

Applying this to the concept of the 7 habits, I would say it fits in quadrant 2 (things that are important but not urgent). If this were to happen in today's world, imagine how the people would go in an uproar had the imam stopped the khutbah to tend to a new Muslim.

4. When you're asked a question, give the answer and something more

The hikmah behind this is because the questioner is already in the mode of receiving inputs, as elaborated in this post.

5. Never answer a question you don't know the answer to, especially if it pertains to the deen

6. The best method of teaching is to ask questions

The Shaykh told us of how hs father used this method to teach him the rules of the road such that when taking the writing test, he passed without even studying the booklet. He also told us of how he uses this technique with his son everytime he's in the car. This was how he taught his son the rules of janazah prayer. On subsequent days he asked his son,

"If you were to die in this car due to an accident, would you need a janazah prayer to be done?" (or something like that)

Since he had already indirectly taught his son the rules days before, his son was able to answer the question and apply what he learned. The nice thing is, the learning is done imprompty, and the child doesn't even realize he's learning!

It has come to the point that everytime they get in the car, his son would ask,

"So what's the question today, Dad?"

Mashaallah!

That's something we can do with our children inshaallah.

This is also something I learned in writing, and I have used it effectively too with the kids, alhamdulillah.

7. Repetition of information leaves a deeper imprint in the mind

Sometimes repeating a phrase several times piques curiosity and then the process of learning is expedited and made more appealing. This is akin to opening with a BANG!


8. If a person does not know something and it's out of ignorance, don't scold

The example he gave for this one is of the bedouin urinating in the masjid. How many times do we scold our children for spilling stuff?

A lot of work in progress for moi on this one. Sigh...

9. Always give examples (analogies)

This is very important because it enables the students to relate to a new concept more easily.

I have alhamdulillah manage to employ this technique quite effectively with the kids. Sometimes it would result in rather comical analogies too I must say.

10. Speak slowly

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam would speak slowly such that people could count his words if they wanted to. The scholars would repeat to aid memorization, and so should we, as is apparent in memorising anything. The prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam would say something and repeat it thrice. The first time is so people could hear it, the second time is to clarify it and the third time is for people to memorize it. A vivid example the Shaykh gave was of the Prophet's sallallahu alayhi wasallam's khutbah at Arafah to the hujjaj. There were no microphones. How could everyone hear him? Through repetition from people to people. There was no rush, and the people were patient, subhanallah!

For this one, I guess I have to put more work into it, as I'm used to garbling up my sentences when speaking due to the speed. When I was growing up, I always feared people would stop listening to me and turn away as I was still speaking to them, so I would speak really quickly, and as years went by, I have developed a rather 'speedy' way of talking.

Sitting Idly

While the rest of the Haylers are enjoying Shaykh Abdulbary's class right now, I am stuck at home tending to some plugged milk ducts. I had the gnawing thought yesterday about this happening, since the nursing times were very spaced out yesterday. I could still make it, but it doesn't seem to be 'unplugging' despite my attempts at draining it. May Allah open the blockage and let open the lines of communication that is very much needed. Plus I think my accumulated frustration, annoyance, and stress also played a part in making me extra susceptible to be afflicted with this yet again, for the 4th time in a period of less than two months.

The 'Cleanest Room in the House' I notice, seems to be looking a bit run down. I don't think they're ready for that hamster yet. Tsk, tsk, tsk.

As for gems for this second weekend, I have to say what struck me most was the concept of Barakah. I knew this before, but there is nothing like delivery of a reminder by someone who is effective as Sheykh Abdulbary. Or maybe it's just the whole aura of the surrounding and environment of people gathering together for two full weekends, forgoing their relaxation, to seek knowledge in the deen.

The blessed hours of the early morning contain barakah, even for the non Muslims. Early Muslims used to take advantage of this, and in doing so, they were able to attain so much in so little time. As we near the Day of Judgment, time seems to decrease, and more so because people do not take advantage of these golden hours. When Sheykh Abdulbary talked about this in class, I couldn't help thinking of my laments over how I don't have enough time to do what I needed and wanted to do. No wonder!

From now on, I really have to strive on working on my Circle of Influence than focusing on my Circle of Concern, I guess, even if it means I would miss out on quality time with hubby. For years I have been trying to practice going to bed early, but I have always stayed back again and again because that is the only time I would get to spend time with hubby. I guess he'll have to be the one making the choice now. I resolve not to budge on this one (Oh Allah, please strengthen my resolve, and open his heart and eyes).

And now, back I go to my attempts of draining this blockage and stoppage, and oh, how many meanings those words carry right now. May Allah make me among those who are patient. Ameen.

The Sadaqah Jar & Worthwhile Projects

Recipe for Financial Success: Save, Sadaqah and Spend.

The Triple S

1. Divide it in half
2. Dump one half of it into the Savings Jar
3. Divide the other one half into thirds
4. Place one third in the SpendingJar/Wallet/Purse
5. Place the remaining two thirds in the Sadaqah Jar.
6. Update ledger

A friend expressed utter surprise when I told her that the kids do have money saved up. It's a cultural and generational difference, I suppose, because where she grew up, the only money she ever saved were those for buying special treats at the store. When I was growing up, I did have some money saved up for emergencies (If my father were suddenly struck with utter poverty, I could come to the rescue and save the family with my savings of 50 Malaysian Ringgit). My husband was also a saver, a very frugal saver at that, as is apparent now.

I have long thought of training the kids to wisely handle their finances. Seeing how hubby is the economics guy, I asked him to handle the matter. Unfortunately, he said that it all comes to him by instinct, and that he doesn't know how to 'teach' it to the kids. In other words, he has no organization whatsoever in his method of saving money.

So it was up to me to yet again do some reading and searching and researching as to a doable method of training your children to manage their finances. K and Rq had mentioned what Muhammad Alshareef taught in Rizq Management about not putting all your eggs in one basket. I had heard about that before, and one day I came across the 3 'basket' method (at least that's what I call it).

So I adapted it for the kids, and assigned each of them three jars. We had some glass spaghetti sauce jars that I had decorated, and in which they had lept their money before. So it wasn't that hard to do what I planned for them to do. Basically, each of them will have:

1. Savings Jar
2. Sadaqah Jar
3. Spending Jar

Each time they are to receive money and make a deposit, they are to follow the Triple S recipe. After a while, dividing up 1 dollar bills into halves and thirds just got tiresome, and we agreed that for small amounts of money, they can divide it as they wish and allocate it as they wish, but that for amounts of $10 or more, they would have to follow the Triple S recipe.

So, for a while, we have had the Sadaqah Jar, which has increasingly been getting full, tabarakallah. Other than donating the money at Jumuah prayer, we thought of sponsoring an orphan as a family, having the kids contribute their Sadaqah money to it. Though we had filled out the forms, it hasn't really taken off yet.

And one day, out of the blue, while I was bloghopping, I stumbled upon the most amazing blog owned by sister Farhana, called Sketched Soul. I have always wanted to do projects like these with the kids, but in light of my full plate, I never got to even hashing out the idea. Alhamdulillah for like-minded sisters that actually takes the time to hash out these ideas and make them a realistic occurence, Allahu Akbar!

All the projects are mashaallah, really great ideas, but two caught my fancy; The Muslimah Doll Project, and the Sew Giving Blanket Drive. More so because these are projects I can directly involve the kids in. Bubbling over with enthusiasm, to which the kids are now very much accustomed to whenever I am struck with an idea for homeschooling, baking, gifts, or arts and crafts projects, I told them of my find. Responding with the same amount of enthusiasm, they eagerly nodded their way to agreeing in contributing in the projects. The only damper is, H is pretty much left out, as he doesn't know how to crochet, and even though he wanted to make the doll in the beginning, he later opted out.

As of now, we have yet to pay a visit to Jo Ann to buy yarn and muslin for the doll's body, and Farhana had said that that project is put on hold for now, but that we can still make the dolls and it will be used for another project inshallah.

S had already started her baby blanket, but we're running out of yarn, so maybe after this weekend, we can make that trip to Jo Ann, inshaallah.

The Vessel Which Carries the 'Ilm

As I was typing my hastily scribbled notes from Chain of Command yesterday, I came across a story I wished to share with the kids. Even from the very beginning, they had expected me to share stories with them from the class, and when we went home for lunch breaks last weekend, they were already asking me to relay to them what I learned in class.

It's amazing what mode you're thrown in when people expect you to relay what you learned to them. All the while I was listening to Shayk Abdulbary, I scribbled as fast as I could, in as much detail as I could, keeping in mind that I am to pass on the knowledge to my children. As opposed to taking notes for myself, the details in which I took my notes were such that I had to use extra paper. In the past, I had taken notes that were probably more 'practical' and realistic, but I noticed that after a while, what I thought I would remember without the aid of keywords or notes, I couldn't remember, so this time, I thought I'd try to get as much down as possible.

As I was telling them some of the things I learned, their thirst for more prompted them to say,

"More!"

Spontaneously, I responded,

"That's what I remember right now," while racking my brains trying to recall what else I had thought I absorbed in the past few hours.

H, as usual, pointed out to me,

"You forgot the rest already?"

I let out an embarassed giggle, and in the midst of trying to make up and excuse for myself, I ended up saying,

"err...well..yeah...I have to look it up."

Talk about poor memory.

So when I came across that story in my notes, I told them (and they were immersed in their school work at the time),

"Oh kids, I found a story I wanna tell you!"

"Yeah, yeah!" H perked up, and abandoned his work.

Seeing that they still haven't finished their work, I said,

"Ok, but finish your work first, and then I'll tell you."

"Ohhhh!" H slumped, and muttered to himself.

When I finally told them about 'The Exorcist', I realized that it was one of those effective teaching moments, much much better than that comprising of elaborate lesson plans brimming with objectives and grade level requirements.

Dhomal al-Azdi was a famous exorcist during the times of the Jahiliyyah. The Quraisy had accused the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam of being possessed, but interestingly they never called upon their resident exorcist to drive the 'occupying jinn' out. Thus, Dhomal himself decided that he will do it for free. So hwe went to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, and told him,

"Speak."

The Prophet Sallallahu alayhi wasallam then said,

"Innalhamdulillah wanasta'inu wanastaghfiru..." basically saying the whole khutbah al hajjah.

Dhomal al-azdi, at the end of it, uttered,

"Ash-haadu allaa ilaha illaallah, wa ash-hadu anna muhammad rasoolullah!"

"No jinn can speak like this," was what he said.

This story stemmed from one of the benefits of studying the Science of Hadeeth: to apprciate the eloquence of the speech of the prophet sallallaahu alayhi wasallam, what is caled Jawwami al qalam.

I don't think they will forget that story for quite some time.

"Do you have anymore?" they asked after I was done telling that story.

"Yes, but not today," I said.

For jewels and gems, given piece meal become more precious than if given as a lump sum.

Still homeschooling?

Our homeschooling has been going on as usual, with me pushing the kids to hurry up and finish their OHVA curiculum so we can move on to more interesting stuff (like actual homeschooling). I am now able to discern the difference between schooling at home and homeschooling, and charter schools utilized for the home and anything of the like is basically school at home in my humble opinion. This year, my eyes have been forced open to see this clearly, thanks to the presence of Baby Z, who basically upped the pace and drove my stress hormones to indescribable speed, thereby forcing me to fish for a solution, which then resulted in me scouring books about homeschooling.

Not that I haven't done it before (scouring through homeschooling books), but I had done so with calm, not with anxiety. It's only when you taste hardship that your heart and eyes are truly open to new perspectives (at least that's my take on it now), and this school year, hardship would somewhat describe our homeschooling experience. And like a domino effect, hardship begets wonders. A Muslim's affair is always good. Therefore, I have discovered wonders. I have discovered that homeschooling is not necessarily about academics. Many parents worry incessantly about their kids achievement in school, fretting over their kids' grades, burying their heads in anguish over why their kid is behind in spelling or arithmetic. I completely relate, for I used to be one of those parents.

Our mission statement with regards to homeschooling now has changed, I believe. It is no longer about them mastering math concepts at their level or above their grade level. it's no longer about them mastering certain skills in Science at their grade level or above. It's about developing, attaining, maintaining, and increasing the love of learning. That's what it should have been in the first place.

Children have a natural curiosity which we by the way, have been tampering with by subjecting them to one- size-fits-all curiculum. We are taking away their individuality by grouping them as one student body and presenting them with a standard product, and expecting them to absorb it. Over the years, then, children have been absorbing those knowledge like robots, whether they lie to or not, and children who protest in their own ways, are labeled disruptive or problematic. In some countries, they are labeled with ADHD and given drugs. Long ago, such students were usually taken out of school, and some have been let 'loose' to pursue their own individual interests and have turned out to be notable people like Thomas Edison. But now, they have become one of the drug-laden children. Sad, isn't it?

I have noticed that my kids' eyes light up when they are discovering things on their own, with no force or pushing from me.

H's chatter would gush out as he explains newfound knowledge or new reflections or hypotheses. N's joy would gradually shine through as she softly shares new facts or information she has just learned from a book. S would glow with building confidence as she presents new animal facts that are unknown to the rest of us.

Left to their own devices, I have discovered that my kids learn better than when I sit there and instruct them in their lessons. Just recently, they managed to master the use of Powerpoint, and tweak the desktop. I don't even remember how it started, but when TV is off limits, trust me, creativity flourishes and the results just astound you.

So, while waiting to finish OHVA, we more or less pushed on with our Quran routine, which at times is left dangling. As Rh now comes to our house again every Friday to teach the kids 'Islamic Studies', they have resumed memorizing Surahs. I had held it bay especially for N because I needed to recuperate and find a way to do it without stretching myself too thin. Hubby has been persistently supervising and helping H memorize, and even that takes a lot of commitment, energy (emotional, mental and physical), and time. S is usually told to review her Yusuf, and N is somewhat abandoned. And I resumed their Quran reading, though to be more realistic, considering I have a baby who wants to nurse and has trouble napping at times, I have split up reading with each child after salat. Some days I will do just N after Zuhr, and the rest after Asr, and some days I will do two of them after Zuhr and the remaining one after Asr, but some days I only get to do one or two of them after the salat. Post fajr though, alhamdulillah, has been more or less consistently Quran time, though it's also the time that Baby Z needs his bath, and food.

While hubby does the memorization with the one of the kids, I do mine, and Baby Z plays with one of them. It has been a challenge, a real challenge to juggle the 3 kids with just the Quran, especially in trying to be consistent.

As for other stuff, since we always put on audio lecture CDs in the van, they get their dose of 'Islamic studies' informally on grocery shopping trips and outings. H gets his share of that in the Jumaah khutbahs too. On their own time, they busy themselves with reading, to the point that it actually annoys us, especially when they are so absorbed in their books that they are oblivious to everything else around them, including our repeated calls.

So, yes, we are still homeschooling, with a 'school at home' curriculum and informal natural learning resources, not to mention the archery, wrestling, and ceramics classes they are attending, alhamdulillah.

What is touted by homeschoolers to homeschooling moms with burnout:

Even if you don't teach for that day, your children are still benefiting.

I found that very hard to swallow before I changed my mindset about the natural learning process and learning opportunities. Now, I actually am able to see this natural learning occuring even when I'm not actively instructing or teaching them. Subhanallah! Sometimes less is more, huh?

If I die today...

We were having lunch, and as I ate my rice and spaghetti combo, I asked H,

"If I die today, what will be the best thing you would remember about me?"

Eyes afixed to the computer screen where his powerpoint slideshow was displayed, he hesitated, and then replied,

"Your cooking."

"My cooking?" I asked, feeling quite incredulous at the implication that my worth as a mother is equated to my cooking.

"Yes, I can't think of anything else," he insisted, eyes still on the computer screen.

What a bad mother I am, I thought, for my son to think only of my cooking when he thinks of me.

'Ok if I die today, what would you miss most about me?" I asked.

"You teaching us," H responded, almost immediately.

Before I knew it, I was asking all of them the same questions.

From N:

Best remembered: "The dresses that you made for us."
Miss the most: "You applogizing to us, and liking our clean room."

From S:

Best remembered: "Your face."
Miss the most: "Doing fun stuff with us."

And before long, I was doing it to all of them too:

To N:
Best remembered: "Her thoughtfulness."
Miss the most: "Her compassion, and stuff that she says makes you go, 'Oh yeah!'"

To S:
Best remembered: "Her thoughtfulness, her cards and notes to me, and her serving guests."
Miss the most: "Her helping me."

To H:
Best remembered: "His curiosity and enthusiasm."
Miss the most: "His chats with me."

For hubby:
Best remembered: "His helping me out around the house."
Miss the most: " His jokes, believe it or not, even though they're not funny."

When I told them what I would best remember about hubby, their faces took on perplexed looks, and H retorted,

"Huh? He does?"

"Do you know how many husband help their wives in the house?" I asked him back.

Without me explaining more, it seemed to dawn on him that it's not that common for husbands to lend helping hands to their wives around the house. It was a very good opportunity for me to emphasize this to him, as I would hope that he would be as helpful and kind to his women too.

For,

The Prophet said: "The most perfect Muslim in the matter of faith is someone who has excellent behavior; and the best among you are those who behave best toward their wives."

Al-Tirmidhi, Hadith 106

and that the Prophet Salllallaahu alayhi wasallam used to help Aisha around the house. For someone to claim that he has been at work all day and too tired to help out in the house, it is worth noting that the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam did a lot outside the home, and even more, but when he came home he still helped out. Subhanallah!

Volume 8, Book 73, Number 65:

Narrated Al-Aswad:

I asked 'Aisha what did the Prophet use to do at home. She replied. "He used to keep himself busy serving his family and when it was time for the prayer, he would get up for prayer."

In some other narrations, Aisha radhiallahu anhu said "...like other men do...", which implies that men at that time used to help their wives around the house. Allaahu Aalim. [source: lecture by Dr Ali Shehata at the TDC 2007]

It started out as a random question. I don't remember what prompted me to ask them, but it turned out to be a very insightful conversation, one that we should cherish as a family.

On the move - Four-Limb-Drive

Baby Z have started to become mobile in the real sense. He is now crawling (still at the beginner's level though) and pulling himself up to stand. In addition, he's also babbling,

"Mamamamamamama,"

and

"Babababababababa,"

and maybe also,

"Papapapapapapa."

To note, he did start with the consonant M first, if I do say so myself.

The kids have become more attached to him now that he's more fun to interact with. It's not uncommon to hear exclamations,

"Oh he's so cute!"

"I can't bear it!"

"He's the cutest baby!"

However, Baby Z has also developed quite a temper, especially when things are taken from him. He has started growling, a deep growl that when I mimic, would drive him into peals of laughter. But when you take things away from him, or interrupt his play or exploration, he would protest with a cry and if you try to pick him up he will stiffen his body and go red in the face. Quite a spectacle to behold. I can only imagine what it would be like when he's in the terrible two age. Oy vey.

I told S,

"I think you and him will be close when he grows up."

"I think he's already attached to me," she said, as she continued feeding him his lunch, while I ate mine, getting ready for the nursing session that was to come afterwards.

"Why?" I asked, surprised that she would make such a statement.

"Because whenever I hold out my arms to him he would be gleeful and smile."

That is true. He does light up whenever Big Sister S offers to pick him up. S is practically like a mother to him. The only thing she doesn't do for him is breastfeeding and changing his poopy diaper. I would give up trying to put him down for his nap, and would usually leave it to her, as she seem to have knack for it, amazingly, ever since Baby Z was a young baby.

Whenever we make salat, we would put him in front of us, and occupy him with something to play with. Most of the times he would sit and watch us as we make ruku' and stand while playing with his item of choice. At other times, he would pat our heads when we make sujud in his vicinity, or worse, start moving away, thus inducing in us increasing fear of him going to forbidden areas.

As we all scramble to pull him back to us whenever he would move towards forbidden areas or items, I recall Dr. D's words of wisdom,

"Enjoy his immobility, because once they start moving, they never stop."

What's on the Menu?

Menu on a poor memory:

The Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wasallam said there are two meals in a day; lobster and crab.

Though I really wouldn't mind that at all, plus all the other stuff the Somali fishermen throw back out to sea after the big catch.

After hours of 50 minutes lectures interspersed by 10 minute breaks, the Sheykh announced that we were going to do an activity.

It was basically like playing the game 'Pass the Message' to members of a group of 6, and have the last person write the message down. With an Islamic twist however, we were supposed to narrate a hadeeth and see how garbled it is by the time it reaches the last person in our group.

I was the second person to in the group, the second to receive the hadeeth from the first person who memorized it as much as she could in a few minutes, and this is what I remember:

Ibn Umar narrated that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam reported: Two animals are made unlawful to you and two blood are made unlawful to you. The two animals are the locust and _______. The two blood are the spleen and the liver.

Rh had forgotten the second animal. I don't quite exactly know what the last person jot down, because as soon as she did, she passed it down to the Sheykh.

What transpired next was hilarious. As there were many groups in the class, there were many 'rendered' hadeeth from each group.

One particular one really cracked me up:

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said there are two meals in a day; the lobster and the crab.

There was another one that was equally funny:

Two animals that are lawful to you is the mucus and .....

You can imagine how bad narrators we all were, and as for strength of memory, ahh...let's just say most of us would fail a memory test.

The actual hadith was,


Abd Allah ibn Umar (Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him eternal peace) said: "Two types of dead meat and two types of blood have been made lawful for our consumption: The two dead meats are: fish and locust, and the two types of blood are: liver and spleen." (Sunan Abu Dawud, Musnad Ahmad and Sunan Ibn Majah)


Prior to this activity, the Sheykh had also told us of his uncle who was stuck in Somalia during World War II. He had lived there for a few months, and he had remarked that Somalia had the best food in the world. The Somali fishermen would take all the fish and throw the rest back in the sea. The best food he was referring to were the other catch that were thrown back to sea. let it be known that the Sheykh was born in Vietnam and is an Asian by ethnicity, so just like us Malaysians, seafood is a very savored food item. And from my interactions with my Somali friends here, I also know that they don't eat squids or shrimps, so the anecdote totally stuck in my mind. (This explains the commentary in small font above.)

I'm thinking that maybe I should do this activity with the kids, to demonstrate how powerful the memory of the sahabahs were, though the Sheykh also narrated instances of this in the story of Abu Hurayrah and Imam Bukhari.

A 'Labor'ious Weekend

I had dreaded this weekend from the moment hubby finalized that I would be the one taking the class. I knew I was right in all my worries and fretting, and I knew he didn't realize the full complications of it.

As Friday approached, I grew restless, worrying about Baby Z's bedtime. He usually sleeps around 7/8 pm, and class starts around 7 pm. I wanted him to sleep at home, and not in his stroller. We pulled it off when he was younger, but with all the difficulties I've been having with his naps and sleeps, I could smell the trouble. But I went on with it. To top it off, even though hubby said he would tell them he wouldn't man the registration table, he did end up having to settle some financial issues for people all weekend.

Baby Z doesn't sleep well at night, which is pretty normal for a human being coming out from my womb. None of my kids ever slept through the night when they were under 1 year old. However, he doesn't nal good either, except for this one period of time which was then disrupted by our trip to Houston for the Texas Dawah Convention. Alas, his naptimes are never the same after that. He would be scratching and then just making his eczema worse, and eventually preventing himself from falling asleep. I have come to savor him falling asleep to the point that I would put everything else on hold just as long as he has a good nap. Suffice it to say, making him sleep and having him sleep for quite some time is no easy feat, though it used to be months ago. We have reached a point where he wouldn't nap because he couldn't or because he was overstimulated, and as a result, he would be cranky at night too, which led me to the world of crankiness myself.

So Friday came. Hubby sat with the kids outside the auditorium, and every break time I would check on Baby Z, to see if he needed nursing. When he did, I would bring him into the auditorium and nurse him in a secluded area. He didn't sleep at his usual bedtime that Friday.

Saturday, he skimped on his morning nap, and didn't nap much in the afternoon. Saturday night, he woke up numerous times, and by Sunday morning, I woke up with a sprained neck, and couln't turn my head to the right without wincing in pain.

I nursed him around 8 am and by 8:50 he had fallen asleep. So I put him down and called Sg to ask if she would be able to pick me up. She couldn't because she had to go early. So close to 9 am, I woke hubby up and told him that we would take H and leave sleeping Baby Z with the girls so he could drop me off.

It wasn't one of the wisest decisions I have mad in my life, but that was the extent to which his sleep problems have plagued me. The repercussions of this was one that was too close for comfort. Only Allah's aid made it too close for comfort and short of a total disaster. Suffice it to say, the Sunday was the most exhausting day of the weekend for me.

Alhamdulillah the neck sprain abated by the end of the day, but throughout the day, there were so many mishaps that I was really worn down, and one thought that kept running through my mind was,

"I shouldn't have taken the class, maybe I should just ditch it and switch my name to hubby's, I should have known better."

However, I didn't run out of class despite the urge to do so, as the content of the class was, mashaallah, invogorating, beneficial, enlightening, and very substantial in providing one with an Eman Rush, alhamdulillah.

Plus, what kept me going was when the kids asked,

"So any stories?"

I told them about the reward for giving salams to the Prophet Sallallaahu alayhi wasallam, stories of Abu Hurayrah, Imam Bukhari, and that was only from one weekend.

Since AlMaghrib is not yet catered to children under 14, I guess I'll have to be the vessel that carries the ilm relayed by the instructors, and be the deliverer of that ilm to my progeny. What a responsibility.

Bring generosity to a new level:

answer a question with the answer and bonus information. The Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wasallam would sometimes answer a question and dish out more information to the questioner. This is one of the etiquettes of teaching from the sunnah, which was covered yesterday in class, mashaallah. It was also mentioned by Muhammad Alshareef in his audio lecture, 21 Teaching Techniques which we had for our Seats of Scholars class sometime ago. The reason behind this technique is taking into account the mode of reception the questioner is already in. Imagine our children asking us a question about anything. The fact that the child is asking the question already puts him in a position ready to receive information. We only need to input and he is ready to process it, as opposed to us forcing the child to digest information when he feels least disposed to even allow the fed information to enter his brain. Think back to times when we sit in languor in school, wishing that we could be outside and play instead, while the teacher drones on at the blackboard, explaining how the British occupied your country.

Imam Malik's Muwatta: Book 2, Number 2.3.12:

Yahya related to me from Malik from Safwan ibn Sulaym from Said ibn Salama of the Bani Azraq from al-Mughira ibn Abi Burda of the tribe of Bani Abd ad-Dar that he had heard Abu Hurayra speak about a man who came to the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, and said, "Messenger of Allah! We travel by sea and we do not carry much fresh water with us so if we do wudu with it we go thirsty. Can we do wudu with seawater?" The Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, replied, "lts water is pure, and its dead creatures are halal."

In this hadith, the prophet sallallaahu walayhi wasallam answered the question and added,

"its dead creatures are halal."

The man never inquired about the halalness of dead creatures of the sea, but the prophet salllallahu alayhi wasallam generously offered than information anyway. Why?

The wisdom behind this is this particular technique in teaching. The mind of the questioner is already in 'input' mode, so it's especially receptive to receiving information. To optimize the input process when the mind is in this state is the epitome of using hikmah in teaching, subhanallah.


In the course of their childhood, our children will ask us a lot of questions, sometimes too much. Instead of giving curt replies, we should take advantage of these learning opportunities, and be generous.

So the next time your child asks you,

"Ummi, why is the sky blue?

You might want to answer,

"Because blue light is scattered more than the other colored light, and the angels drive the clouds to where Allah wants to bring rain."

However, if they ask,

"Mommy, where do babies come from?"

Use your hikmah and gauge their understanding, age, and the real question behind that much-feared question.

Gems from Chain of Command

Bring generosity to a new level:
answer a question with the answer and bonus information.

Menu on a poor memory:

The Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wasallam said there are two meals in a day; lobster and crab.



Though I really wouldn't mind that at all, plus all the other stuff the Somali fishermen throw back out to sea after the big catch.

Manners is a reflection of polished character.

How dusty are we?

Repetition breeds memorization, inshaallah!

What you cherish and love, you will never forget.

The difference between a person accepting dawah or not might lie in the embodiment of manners in the daa'ee.

The difference between a person accepting dawah or not might lie in the utilization of hikmah by the da'ee.

The technicality of something need not necessarily be known in technical terms and jargon to the one who truly masters the subject.

In no other science is the narrators in a chain more scrutinized and well known than in the Science of Hadeeth.

The Science of Hadeeth is so unique that it is incomprehensible to the non Muslims. The closest they could relate to was probably folktales and legends passed down from generation to generations by possibly unknown narrators in the chain.


Rice and banana may not be the best food combo for some people, or squid may seem appaling as a food item, just like dhabb was not appealing to the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi wasallam.

Somalia has the best food in the world, but unfortunately, they're thrown back to the sea after the catch.

Again and again, the differences among us is celebrated, highlighting:

Ar-Rum (30:22) And among His signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth, and the difference of your languages and colors. Verily, in that are indeed signs for men of sound knowledge.)

A Hujuraat (49:13) O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes that you may know one another.

And...again, this demonstrates the many lessons that can be extracted from a hadeeth. Subhanallah!

More gems to come inshaallah...with the elaboration, biiznillah.