I Don't Know What It's Called

I was on the couch. Hubby was on the floor. Suddenly we heard a very familiar howl outside, on the back porch. At first we ignored it, but it grew louder and louder. Thinking that he might be hurt, I urged hubby to go and check it out.

H was howling, screaming, bawling in the loudest manner possible facing A & M, two of his older friends he was apparently playing with before he turned into a howling monkey.

It was evident after a while that he was horribly furious(and that is an uderstatement) at those two boys, who were mounted on their bikes at a safe distance, looking on at the scene unfolding before them. With his brown kufi on his head, and angry tears running down his face, H seemed very much out of control. I've seen him furious at his sisters but he was never that furious. This was a new level altogether.

Hubby took hold of his hand and tried to pull him inside the house. He resisted.

"It's ok. You're good. You didn't hit nobody," he said to H. He kept on howling and simply refused to be brought inside.

I gestured for him to come in. In that 'mother-child' universal language, I told him to come inside and tell me what happened. He relented somewhat but ended up on the kitched floor still bawling and howling. I left him, sat on the couch and signalled for him to come to me again. He came.

"What happened?"

With great difficulty amidst his loud uncontrollable sobs, he told me.

'A' had called him a 'crybaby'. They were playing basketball and H was counting. 'A' said he counted wrong. H persisted that he counted right and that A had counted wrong. Now this is funny because 'A' is 10 years old and H is only 6, yet I know how stubborn my son can be insisting that he's right and other people are wrong.

I asked him what happened step by step and he told me, soon losing his sobs.

"What did you do when A said you counted wrong? Did you shout like you did in front of Auntie M's house?"

He nodded.

"Then what did you do?"

He paused. Then he said,

"I don't know what it's called!"

And resorted to crying again. I couldn't help giggling. That stoked up his anger even more.

I know what it's called, by the way. It's called 'kindergartener tantrum'.

After an extensive investigation, I learned that he had got on his bicycle and rode home in anger after bawling. Hid in the bush to hide from the two boys who were coming after him. They had come after him only to witness his outburst which must have seemed so 'out of this world'. 'A' had apparently called M to watch this little crybaby yell his brains out. That made H even madder. So when he got home, on our back porch, not being able to shoo the two boys away, he did the only thing he knew to do: bawl and scream. It was almost a blood curling continuous scream.

Later on he told me, "I felt like my brains were almost bursting, that my head was shaking and my ketai* almost fell off my head."

* ketai comes from the word ketayap which is a Malay word for kufi. The kids practically invented that word and we have used it ever since.

For a disturbing while I wondered if it was at all healthy for him to submit to such screaming in anger. However, hubby's words "You didn't hurt nobody," struck me.

I repeatedly asked H, "Did you say any bad words to them? Did you hit them?"

He shook his head to both. I can only pray he's telling the truth. I believe him though.

Alhamdulillah he's only screaming his brains out, and not actually giving anyone a bloody nose or letting out a string or unmentionables. Alhamdulillah.

However, he's only 6. There're more years to go. I really need to protect them from picking up those bad behaviors, especially the unmentionables.

He spent the rest of the afternoon asking us what animals we can find in Malaysia. After each answer, he would dash upstairs only to come down again and ask for another one. Meanwhile, his two sisters, curiosity piqued by what just happened, went outside to play.

I still am nervous about raising boys. Don't know a thing about it. That's my stupid reason for not agreeing to the circumcision right after he was born: I was afraid to take care of his 'birdie'. He finally was circumcised at five years old. Alhamdulillah.

Boys. I have only one. At least a living one. I hope I'll raise him right insyaallah.