How it all started: Part 1

When people ask me when I started homeschooling, my immediate answer would be,

"When S was in preschool," and then I would tell them about the amazing turn of events that eventually led to me pulling her out of school and beginning our journey into this unknown terrain.

However, after doing a lot of reading, pondering, and reflecting, I do believe that it all began after I graduated and stayed home. I was in my junior year of college when I had S. I was in my senior year when I had N. By the time I graduated, I had two girls, and H came later on, in the year that teemed of Y2K bug talk: 2000.

I realized that I never wanted to work outside the home, and I relished the idea of staying home full time. I never was a career-minded person to begin with, and I very much savor my time at home, where I'm free to pursue creative outlets with no audience. I guess you could say I'm an introvert, though my mother would disagree, as she said that I was really very talkative as a 3 year old.

I began my life as a stay-at-home mother with three young children aged 2,1, and less than a year. I have a natural love for reading. I love places that harbor books : libraries. When S turned 3, my mother suggested I do the Glenn Doman method to teach her how to read, because my mother had done it on my younger sister when she was 3. My sister was able to read at the age of 3, but since my mother 'abandoned' all effort of teaching when my 4 brothers cam einto the picture, my sister eventually forgot how to read on her own, and had to relearn it when she was of school going age.

I immediately bought the book, and started reading it. Since I was already surrounding the kids with books, and reading to them, I began to prepare the cards myself, since the kit was a little bit too expensive for us. Hours of measuring, cutting were spent on those cards. Alhamdulillah hubby took pity on me and offered to cut them with the paper cutter at his office on campus. As I began to do the reading game (that's what we call it) with S, she began to absorb it like any other young kid would, mashaallah! Within 6 months, she was reading on her own. From then on, she was able to enjoy books on her own, at a new level, alhamdulillah.

I also started teaching her to read Quranic Arabic, using the Malaysian series IQRA, and since the fonts were quite small for a 3 year-old, I employed Doman's method/principles/theory, and wrote out the letter she was having trouble with on a white board that hung in our living room. Everyday I would point to the trouble letter until she got it. I probably didn't realize it back then, but I was homeschooling!

I tried to do the reading game with N and H, but we were constantly on the move such that I wasn't consistent in it, and in frustration, I dropped it altogether. Nevertheless, to my surprise, both N and H displayed an interest in reading (probably from seeing S reading out loud on her own), and practically learned how to read on their own (when they were about 4/5 years old) from Starfall and Between the Lions.

I suppose reading seemed very appealing to them, since that was what we were continuously doing at home. Visits to the bookmobile was a must every Friday, and on the way home, our 'library bag' would be filled to the brim, looking a lot like the Big Bad Wolf's tummy that was filled with stones. I would let them watch Eyewitness videos, and other documentaries filled with animals. I used to let them watch cartoons (mostly from PBS) but I controlled the music, muting the TV whenever they come on. It was a fun and relaxed learning atmosphere, which I now miss so much. It is only a few years ago that they stopped watching TV altogether, except for some occasional Nature, Nova and National Geographic, alhamdulillah.

Their bedtime ritual was me reciting the three quls and ayatul kursi to them, while they lay in bed. After a while, with no planning on my part, S and N began to recite after me, finishing off the verses, and I realized with elation, that they were indirectly memorizing them. I began to also recite other short surahs, which their young absorbent minds began to soak up like very hungry sponges. Looking back, I wished I had read about the Montessori principles back then, but I guess being a young and inexperienced mother, I felt overwhelmed by everything out there related to parenting and child development that I didn't actively research the topic as I am now.

I didn't declare myself as homeschooling back then, but that didn't deter people from passing off judgmental and patronizing comments.

"You teach them how to read at such a young age, and immerse them in all this learning, when they grow up, they're going to be bored with learning," said one.

I wished then that I hadn't shared the Glenn Doman method with them. I kept my mouth shut, and as is normal, I mulled over what was said, and wondered if I was setting my children up for disaster later on. However, I doggedly continued what I was doing, as I silently regarded all those generalization as stemming from what was put in the limelight (brainy kid reading at the age of 2, forced to go to college at age 10, and brainy kid later on declares he doesn't want anything to do with learning). Ironic too that one who would let the kids 'have fun' when they were younger, would later subject their children to continuous burdens of academic expectations, resulting in burnout nonetheless: and all because of societal pressure. I wasn't doing it out of societal pressure. I was doing it because I thought,

"Wow, if they could learn to read this early, imagine how much more they could enjoy books, at a new level! It would open up a whole new world for them!"

I wasn't competing with anyone, nor was I on the path of putting my children in the Child Prodigy Hall of Fame.

Alhamdulillah though, reading to them is now a pleasure, not something forced, and they do it to such an extent that we actually have to tell them to stop. They are thus independent in the learning process. They don't need me to teach them stuff. They are discovering on their own. of course I still worry, but I think reading has become such a natural thing to them now, that it would be like stripping them of their own skin if we were to tell them to stop it altogether.